{"id":1785,"date":"2020-12-13T10:03:53","date_gmt":"2020-12-13T18:03:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/?p=1785"},"modified":"2020-12-13T10:04:58","modified_gmt":"2020-12-13T18:04:58","slug":"stop-the-bullying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/2020\/12\/13\/stop-the-bullying\/","title":{"rendered":"Stop The Bullying"},"content":{"rendered":"

During this period of quarantine, we\u2019ve had an opportunity to see ourselves from the inside out, to see who we are and how we act in stressful situations. In general, we try to be good people, do the right thing and treat others like we treat ourselves. But how do we really treat ourselves?<\/span><\/p>\n

We\u2019re all aware of the destructive power of bullying and where it happens \u2013 by text, on the phone, on social media and in person. \u201cI\u2019d never do that,\u201d we think to ourselves. \u201cI would never be cruel enough to find constant fault with someone and be a mean girl. Or a mean boy. I would never tell someone that they’re not good enough,\u201d we say, \u201cor that they\u2019re fat and unattractive and they just don’t measure up. I’d never tell someone that they’re untalented and they might as well just give up before they embarrass themselves. Right?<\/span><\/p>\n

Wrong. If we take an honest look at ourselves, most of us are being bullies every single day. We find fault, we speak harshly, we judge and swear and cajole and discourage . . . ourselves. While we work at being to be kind to other people and treating them with respect, why do we leave ourselves out? One day when I was shaming and blaming myself for something that was trivial in the scheme of things, I stopped a moment and thought, \u201cIf somone else were beating me up like this, I\u2019d call the cops.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Being mean to ourselves is a bad habit that keeps us down. It\u2019s how we stop ourselves from trying new things and making new friends. Pushing ourselves around creates so much anxiety and discontent, it stops us from recognizing and appreciating who we are, how we look and what we would like to do to enjoy our lives. So how do we break the habit? How do we cut through the meanness and stop treating ourselves with disrespect?<\/span><\/p>\n

Like most habits, it takes a lot of practice and repetition to change our behavior. Look at how long we’ve practiced being angry at ourselves and making ourselves feel small and undeserving of love and forgiveness. If we took 10% of the time we spend beating ourselves up and practiced self-appreciation instead, if we committed ourselves to mindfulness and self-love, we\u2019d be well on our way to changing our thoughts that are cruel and destructive and enjoying the good moments to the fullest.<\/span><\/p>\n

Do you have any idea how often you turn in on yourself and cause yourself pain and anxiety? When you get stuck there, it\u2019s a good idea to call a friend who loves you. Sometimes they see you in ways that you can’t see yourself. I remember saying to friends more than once, \u201cTry seeing yourself like I see you. Have I ever been that mean to you?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

If you stop the bullying right now and begin to treat yourself with loving kindness and compassion, it\u2019ll change your life in the best way possible. The late motivational speaker and spiritual guide, Louise Hay, said, \u201cYou\u2019ve been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn\u2019t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Do you bully yourself? Do you appreciate yourself. Do you do some of both?<\/span><\/p>\n


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During this period of quarantine, we\u2019ve had an opportunity to see ourselves from the inside out, to see who we are and how we act in stressful situations. In general, we try to be good people, do the right thing and treat others like we treat ourselves. But how do we really treat ourselves? We\u2019re […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":1784,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1785","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1785","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/5"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1785"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1785\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1784"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1785"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1785"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.andreacagan.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1785"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}